- Morgan Rusler
- Steven Byzinsky / Private Detective John Shat
- Hayley Man
- Marlene Fujiyama
- Angelle Brooks
- Dr. Foxy Brown, Phd
- David James Alexander
- Bob Suzuki
- JD Cullum
- Laurence St. Lawrence
- Hrundi V. Bakshi
- Taxi Driver
- Kevin W. Walsh
- Zombie Engineer
- Ariella Vaccarino
- Zombie Teacher
- Eric Marx
- Zombie Chef
- Dick Thorne
- Martin #1
- Gregory Cupoli
- Martin #2
- Que Kelly
- Pink Tourguide
- Wayne Previdi
- Jim
- Hans Uder
- John
- Rod McCary
- Mr. Pasadena
- Walter H. McCready
- Diva Gay Killer
- Curtis Davis
- Prison Thug Gay Killer / Hospital Orderly
- Butch Klein
- Hairstylist Killer
- Albert Dayan
- Biker Gay Killer
- Michael Franks
- Preppy Gay Killer
- Jaime Sage
- Juan de Queso
- Allen Reed
- Nevin Sherbourne
- Heather Simpson
- Trisha Sherbourne
- Jeff Malmberg
- The Tree
- Michael Harbour
- Sextronaut
- Tom Putnam
- Pizza Guy
- Denny Densmore
- Donut-Eating Cop
- Robert Dahey
- Mike Fujiyama / Yoshi (as Mark Lee)
- Yakov Blema
- Piston Club Cashier
- Ashley Taylor
- Angry Hooker #1
- Ashley Taylor Tickell
- Angry Hooker #1
- Sabrina Bertaccini
- Angry Hooker #2
- Lance Ericson
- Love-Struck Male Stripper / Hospital Orderly
- Thomas M. Starko
- Angry Baseball Coach
- David Wai-Sheung Lee
- Pug-Nosed Bully
- Raquel Frankenberg
- Angry Female Stripper
- Beverly Trachenberg
- Angry Female Stripper
- Tanya Beilke
- Angry Female Stripper
- Michael George
- Piston Club Stripper
- Vince Jolivette
- Dancer
- Greg Guzzetta
- Additional cast
- Rafael Antonio Oliver
- Voice of Marlene Fujiyama
- Brad Orchard
- Additional cast
- Gary Coleman
- Mister Gary Coleman
- Harold Gardner
- Mr. Futterman
- Aaron A. Ramirez
- Fernando
- Joel Taffel
- Bavarian Hit Woman
- Randy Law
- Gay Underwear Model
- Erik Linthhorst
- Very Gay Underwear Model
- Angus McDoon
- Gayest Underwear Model
