A somewhat reluctant vampire is taken out by his sexpot sister for his first "night out on the town."
A Polish Vampire in Burbank" is the story of a poor unfortunate vampire named Dupah (Mark Pirro) who has never bitten anybody in his life, because he always felt his fangs were too small. For years he would sit at home in a large castle in the hills of Burbank and drink leftover blood with a straw from a ziplock baggie. One day, his father (Hugh O. Fields), kicks him out of the house exclaiming that "I've been the bloodwinner long enough...." Dupah then goes on a reluctant quest for blood with the help of his sister, Yvonne (Marya Gant) and the skeletal remains of his long deceased brother, Sphincter (Eddie Deezen).
In his travels, he encounters Delores Lane (Lori Sutton), an instructress at a local health club who just happens to have a mad passion for vampire movies. At first, Dupah targets her as his first victim, until he starts to fall for her and doesn' t want to lose her respect by biting her.