Summaries

Synopsis

Officer Wu [Fung Woo] has been ordered by his superior, Officer Chan [Tat-wah Cho], tomaltreat the nine new S.W.A.T. trainees in order to force them to resignrather than to be dismissed (apparently for financial reasons). Wu will bepromoted to Chan's position and given a British passport, so Wu is eagerto do his duty. The five new male trainees -- Charlie [Charlie Cho], Long [Lap-Man Sin], Yung [Billy Lau], Myths [Andy Hui Chi-On], and Sickness [?] -- arrive at the Royal Hong Kong Police S.W.A.T. Training Campat the same time as the four new female trainees -- Sister Nine [Sandra Ng Kwan Yue], May [Yuk-Ting Lau], Chan Put San [Joanna Chan],and Szema Yin [?]. Within minutes, Myths has staked his claim on Yin. Just as Longhits on May, Wu walks up accompanied by his female assistant, OfficerScimkovaca [Meg Lam]. After all nine trainees have been properly chastized, they aretold to go to their respective dorms, as there will be no "monkey affairs"in this camp.

That evening, the new trainees decide to throw a barbecue so thatthey can all get acquainted. While eight of the trainees munch on chickenwings under Scimkovaca's watchful eyes, Charlie is being wooed by Wu to behis snitch, with a promise to make Charlie an assistant if he will spy onthe trainees and report any evidence of them screwing up or "wooing" eachother. As the evening grows darker, the trainees tell each other ghoststories, which gives them plenty of opportunity to jump into each others'arms during the scary parts. When Sickness goes off into the trees to pee,he finds a Chinese ouija board and brings it back to the group. Mythsexplains how it works but warns everyone that they must each place theirfinger on the "saucer" and never take it off or the summoned ghost canpossess them.

When the saucer begins to move, they test out its truthfulness byasking questions. Sickness asks how many pills he's taken that day, andthe board answers correctly. San asks how many of the trainees were bornin the same month; again, the spirit answers correctly. Nine asks whetherthe spirit is male or female (female). Yung asks how she died. Suddenlythe board starts going wild. When the spirit replies that she was rapedand killed, San asks the spirit's age when she got killed (20). Yin thenasks the spirit where she is now, and the board goes wild again, this timethrowing them back, causing everyone but Myths to lose their grips on thesaucer. Just then, Officer Wu walks in and forces everyone back to theirdorms. Later that night, as everyone lies sleeping, the windows are blownopen and the vampire-ghost [King-Tan Yuen] enters Myths' body.

The next morning when the trainees meet for their first trainingsession, Myths doesn't show. Scimkovaca finds him cowering in his bed,covering his head to block out the sunlight. When she ascertains that hiseyes are bloodshot, his head and body are freezing, and his "one thing"has no response when stroked, she agrees that he is ill and can't get (it)up. After a day of carrying bricks up and down hills (the girls end uplosing and have to unclog all the sewage drains in the camp), the traineesare treated to a dinner of heaping bowls of rice that they must eat infive minutes or get no food tomorrow. After stuffing themselves with rice,Wu laughs and says they aren't getting any food tomorrow anyway.

Meanwhile, Myths (who has been sent to the infirmary) attacks andkills the doctor, drinking blood from his neck. After that, he lures Nineinto the trees supposedly to tell her who is in love with her. Just ashe's about to bite Nine's neck, Scimkovaca shows up and breaks them up,sending Nine back to her dorm and beating Myths with her nightstick for"wooing." Myths returns to the men's dorm where he finds Long crawling onthe floor and looking for his lost bracelet. Instead, Long finds one ofMyths' amulets. When Myths leaps for Long's neck, Long hands him back hisbeads. At the touch of the amulet, the ghost leaves Myths' body. As Mythslies trembling on the floor, the trainees think he is having an epilepticfit and use the old Chinese method of biting his nipples to stop it. Mythsfights them off and then explains that he was possessed by a ghost andthat it is her intention to kill everyone in the camp.

That night, after everyone is in bed, May gets up to meet with herwooer. Instead, she runs into the ghost, who immediately takes over herbody. Just as May is about to go down on Yin's neck, Nine wakes up, seesthem together, and, thinking that Yin is Long, jumps on May. Just then Wuenters the dorm and, to punish their foolishness, he sends everyone, girlsand guys, out to catch mosquitoes in plastic bags. When May goes off tocatch mosquitoes alone, Myths and Nine follow her, only to see her pounceon Sickness' neck and drink his blood. By the time Nine and Myths alertthe other trainees, however, all evidence is gone.

The next day is another grueling day of training, as the new recruitsare made to carry buckets of water while traversing an obstacle course.The girls win this race (thanks to a little help from Long and Yung), soWu declares a tie and makes everyone clean the drain pipes. That night,Myths wakes up all the guys and has them peek in the window of the girls'dorm. As they watch, they see May wake up and try to attack the othergirls, but she is thwarted by their spells. May runs outside and vanishes,so everyone tries looking for her. Unfortunately, Scimkovaca finds herfirst and pays the price. When they can't find May, the trainees try toconvince Wu that May has been possessed by a ghost, but he refuses tobelieve them. To Wu's great pleasure, the trainees decide to resign fromthe training camp. After further discussion, however, the trainees decidethat it is their duty to stay and help May, so they rescind theirresignation, much to Wu's displeasure.

The trainees split up and go in search of May, but to no avail. Whenthey check the garbage dumpster, however, and find the chopped up bodiesof the doctor and Scimkovaca, Wu still doesn't believe them. Somehow,Officer Chan gets word of the murders and telephones Wu with an ultimatum:Either you find out who is committing the murders or you must retire andlive in China. Wu searches the camp, but everyone appears to havedisappeared, so he decides to take a bath while he waits for them. Hereturns to his quarters and turns on the bathtub faucets only to find thatthe plumbing is screwed up, such that turning on the bathtub faucetactually turns on the sink and turning on the sink flushes the toilet.Sure that the trainees are playing a trick on him, Wu is surprised whenMay suddenly appears and jumps him.

Finally convinced that May has been possessed by a ghost, Wu is happywhen the trainees show up and splash May with black dog's blood, whichputs her out of commission. The ghost leaves May's body and tries to findanother one. She chases four of the trainees into the dorm where they hideunder the beds. Just as she discovers them, the rest of the trainees pourinto the room and cover the ghost with a sheet. Myths attempts to placetwo spells on her, but she is too strong, so he calls up two child ghostswho try to beat the big ghost by asking her for milk. Again, the big ghostis too strong.

Myths has one more idea. He has the other trainees pour milk on theghost and lure her away while he quickly mixes up a thunder spellconsisting of Buddha's bead, incense ash, and vermillion. When ready, Mythsgives everyone a bunch of thunder spells and instructs them to throw themat the ghost. He then has Yung use his gun to shoot the spells right intothe ghost, luring her into a protective circle. Once inside the circle,Sickness lights it as Yung keeps shooting. The ghost eventually burns upand explodes into nothingness.

The next day, Officer Chan shows up and assures the trainees, who areall packed up and ready to leave, that the seniors have decided to retaintheir services, double their salaries, and send them on a mission todestroy a devil of a thousands years.

No way!

Original Synopsis by bj_kuehl.