Summaries

Synopsis

Once again, blue-eyed blonde Venus has fled from the Olympus to Earth - to enjoy the company of a man. Jupiter sends a dart against Adonis, who falls dead at Venus' feet. Mars insinuates that Jupiter is afraid of Venus, "the most beautiful woman on Earth". Juno, Jupiter's wife and Mercury insist with Jupiter that Venus herself should be punished. But Jupiter hesitates about to whom Venus should be married.

Venus visits the blacksmith Vulcan's workshop, and praises his work, and the big swords he produces, while her eyes dart to his bare-chest, well-built body. "Are you always alone?""None of your business," he replies, harshly.He is attracted to her alright, but he wants to wait for Jupiter's decision about whom she shall marry.

Mars is not one to wait - and invites Venus to marry him and elope out of Olympus in his four-horse chariot that very night, which she accepts. Mars visits Vulcan's shop too, and wants to have a beautiful shield he sees there, but it is denied to him; Maciste says it is customer-made for Hercules. Mars is upset that a simple man can have what he wants to possess. After some words, the two gods fight - like men - until Jupiter himself enters the cave, and orders them to stop.

Pluto, God of Darkness, had come with Jupiter and, before leaving, he shows his devious character; he robs a little dagger from Vulcan's forge and hides it in his cape.

Warned about Venus hasty departure, Vulcan tries to stop Mars from abducting Venus, but is stopped by a Titan armed with a trident, who wounds him. In consequence, Vulcan falls from the Olympus to Earth - but he is so lucky that he lands by a seashore where Etna and six other long black-haired Nymphs wearing mini-dresses, are frolicking on the water. They help him to stand and walk - but then, a few man-lizards come upon them armed with tridents, and capture them all.

Meanwhile, Mars and Venus arrived on a war-chariot to the court of Milos, the bald King of the Thracian. Mars plans to build a bamboo tower high enough to reach the Olympus, up which a good number of Thracian warriors will step. When the soldiers arrive at the gates of Olympus, Jupiter will lose his powers, and Mars will be King! And Venus will be his queen. King Minos will have a royal reward.

King Minos calls it "audacious" and says, "It's madness! Folly!" It will take many, many more men than he has, if they want to get this done. Mars tells him to capture some more slaves from Sicily. The king is reluctant to join Mars in his plan to overthrow Jupiter, but then Venus starts her seduction number.

Geo, a man who's courage is proportionate to his little size, is charged by the prisoner Nymphs to inform their father Neptune of the situation - which he does, reluctantly.

Meanwhile, Vulcan has wrestled with and killed the leader of the lizard-men, and shortly after, he leaves those caves in Etna's company - promising the other Sicilian prisoners, now free, that he shall return.

Under the protection of Neptune, Vulcan is enjoying a lascivious dance by Etna when suddenly, Mercury interrupts it. Mercury announces that Mars has rebelled against Jupiter, which leads Vulcan to ask permission to return to Earth in order to do battle and submit Mars. Neptune blesses Vulcan's self-imposed mission.

Mercury's hand was already being attracted by Etna's thigh, Neptune pulls his ear like a misbehaving kid.Vulcan wishes to return alone to do battle with Mars, considering the danger of the mission, but Etna wants to go with him; he rudely shoves her back. Instead, he takes Geo as his companion - against his will... but Etna follows him anyway, unseen, from a distance.Mars calls for Eris's help, and the brunette goddess of hate is only too ready to be of help.

The King and his men have gathered a good number of Sicilian people, and made them slaves again; then they proceed to whiplash them at will, namely their leader, Yulo.

Etna is captured by cavemen, but her screams reach Geo's ears, and Vulcan beats the half a dozen cavemen single-handled, or rather with the unnecessary help of Geo, who clubs a pair of cavemen who were already knocked down.

An oracle reveals to Mars and King Milos that Vulcan is approaching, and that he comes with a beautiful woman. Indeed, a beautiful Sicilian brunette is about to do something desperate to stop the building of the tower: either escape, or sabotage the tower. Anyway, her moment of rebellion is short lived; she's caught by the soldiers, and led to the King, who orders her to be whipped.

Geo seems to be playing with sand, but he's actually foreseeing the right way to the King's camp... (The little man has powers, too.)

Vulcan, forced to accept Etna's company, is unable to sleep at night without her company. Next morning, he lives her again, ordering her to wait for his return. She does, only to be captured again; this time, by King Milos' soldiers. He's about to kill her, as she doesn't want to tell where Vulcan is, but Mars interferes, deciding that to keep her alive will bring Vulcan after her, so that he can meet him in deadly combat.

In the royal tent, Venus has a sleepless night; the words of the oracle come back to her, and her heart is filled with jealousy for the woman prisoner outside, bound to a post in the cold darkness of the night... She grabs a piece of cloth to protect her almost nude body, and goes out to confront Etna - the woman who has won Vulcan's heart. She does an interrogation of her own about Vulcan's whereabouts, but Etna takes a good look at her, and replies, "Go away. Vulcan hates you. I hate you, too!" She is slapped and back slapped for it.

Next morning, Vulcan and Geo are infiltrating the King's camp. Yulo, the Sicilian rebel leader, was not dead yet, against what the soldiers had thought, and he is revived by Vulcan. In silence, they cut the metal chains off the slaves' hands. Vulcan leads the attack, and former slaves armed with makeshift weapons battle the well armed soldiers. The Thracian King is killed with a spear to the chest by Yulo and the tide turns against the Thracians.

Geo cuts the rope around Etna's wrists, and she gladly frees herself of the other binds. Then, Etna, wearing a sleeveless pink top over a light blue skirt, runs after Venus, whom she has seen running into her tent, wearing a sleeveless black dress and armed with a long whip. Once inside, Etna takes two long whip slashes that send her to the ground. Venus keeps using the long whip on Etna's defenseless body, about six times, until the girl manages to grab the whip, and pull suddenly. Surprised, Venus falls, and let's go of the whip's handle. Now it's her turn to take the medicine she had given to Etna.

Outside, the battle rages on, and Vulcan does a couple of deeds of strength and then he comes head to head with Mars. The two bare-chest heroes wrestle, punch and kick each other to the groin. The men's fight comes a halt when Vulcan's bear-hug breaks Mars' strength. Mars falls onto his back, Vulcan kneels astride his waist, and lifts up a sword to plunge it hilt deep into Mars' chest (who's vulnerable when on Earth...).

Jupiter's commanding voice is heard over the valley, stopping all combat. While all the standing men - and Etna and Venus (denoting a cut in their fight scene) - look up at the clouded sky from where Jupiter's voice comes, Mars takes Venus' hand, and runs away with her.

Jupiter condemns Mars and Venus to some penalty, and determines that Vulcan shall stay on Earth until the father of the gods so wishes, a sentence that pleases both Vulcan and Etna, now hugging and smiling, like Yulo and the Rebel Girl, as the adventure comes to THE END.