2003

S3.E1 ∙ Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts

Sun, Sep 18, 2005

After Alan falls off the roof, Charlie has to look after the adolescent and increasingly obnoxious Jake for the weekend.

7.8 /10

S3.E2 ∙ Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover

Sun, Sep 25, 2005

Alan must lobby Jake's principal to keep him from getting expelled, leaving Charlie to manage the chiropractic office for the day.

8.1 /10

S3.E3 ∙ Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark

Sun, Oct 02, 2005

After it's revealed Alan and Judith have been trying to reconcile, Charlie, Evelyn, and Rose vie for the role of spoiler.

7.7 /10

S3.E4 ∙ Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs

Sun, Oct 09, 2005

Alan looks for a new place after he invites Berta to stay at Charlie's house, bringing the brothers to blows.

7.7 /10

S3.E5 ∙ We Called It Mr. Pinky

Sun, Oct 16, 2005

Charlie's inability to reciprocate his girlfriend's love forces him to examine his relationships with women.

7.7 /10

S3.E6 ∙ Hi, Mr. Horned One

Sun, Oct 23, 2005

Charlie's Satan-worshiping girlfriend has a knack for the supernatural, and seems to be the cause of some strange happenings around the Harper house.

8.4 /10

S3.E7 ∙ Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop

Sun, Nov 06, 2005

Charlie gets drunk and sleeps with Rose on her birthday. Rose says she knows it's no big deal. But her father quickly shows up at Charlie's house, under the impression that they've been dating for two years.

7.9 /10

S3.E8 ∙ That Voodoo That I Do Do

Sun, Nov 13, 2005

Charlie bribes Jake into taking ballet lessons so he can try to win over the teacher, but uncle and nephew end up competing for her affections.

8.3 /10

S3.E9 ∙ Madame and Her Special Friend

Sun, Nov 20, 2005

Charlie's elderly neighbor has an uncomfortable business proposition for Alan.

8 /10

S3.E10 ∙ Something Salted and Twisted

Sun, Nov 27, 2005

After Alan goes on a dinner with Jake, Charlie and Evelyn, he becomes fed up with seeking approval from women and decides to quit doing so with a little help from Charlie.

7.5 /10

S3.E11 ∙ Santa's Village of the Damned

Sun, Dec 18, 2005

Alan's girlfriend Sandy is Malibu's answer to Martha Stewart, causing Alan and Charlie to pack on the pounds. Their desire for her fabulous culinary output is ultimately overwhelmed by her craziness.

8.3 /10

S3.E12 ∙ That Special Tug

Sun, Jan 08, 2006

After a disastrous evening out with his brother, Charlie decides it is time to see a shrink.

8 /10

S3.E13 ∙ Humiliation Is a Visual Medium

Sun, Jan 22, 2006

Charlie has to decide whether he can really commit to a serious relationship with Mia, especially when sex is currently off the agenda. Unsurprisingly, his suggestion that he sleep with other women in the meantime falls on somewhat stony ground.

7.6 /10

S3.E14 ∙ Love Isn't Blind, It's Retarded

Sun, Feb 05, 2006

As Charlie tries to receive his version of benefits from the relationship he has with Mia, Alan starts dating Charlie's most recent ex-girlfriend.

8.2 /10

S3.E15 ∙ My Tongue Is Meat

Sun, Feb 26, 2006

Forced to hide in his garage to enjoy a brace of beers and half a Cuban cigar, Charlie's attempts to keep his unhealthy lifestyle habits secret from Mia fall apart when she smells bacon on his breath, resulting in their first major argument since taking their relationship to a physical plane.

7.8 /10

S3.E16 ∙ Ergo, the Booty Call

Sun, Mar 05, 2006

Jake's twelfth birthday approaches. Alan is busy with young, hot Kandi.

8.4 /10

S3.E17 ∙ The Unfortunate Little Schnauzer

Sun, Mar 12, 2006

Charlie is nominated for an award, but he knows his rival Archie will win, as usual, so he doesn't want to attend it. Rose asks Charlie to help her with her boyfriend Gordon.

7.5 /10

S3.E18 ∙ The Spit-Covered Cobbler

Sun, Mar 19, 2006

Alan is having financial problems: Kandi is too "expensive" for him.

7.7 /10

S3.E19 ∙ Golly Moses, She's a Muffin

Sun, Apr 09, 2006

Charlie learns that Kandi has been living with them for three weeks. It turns out he hasn't even noticed some furniture changes. Alan wants to try her as secretary, but Charlie doesn't think she's smart enough for that.

7.9 /10

S3.E20 ∙ Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro

Sun, Apr 23, 2006

Alan is forced to admit to Charlie, who keeps rubbing it in, that he has hit rock-bottom now that his brainless girlfriend, Kandi, has moved in with his ex-wife. It's all so confusing that Jake would prefer the ladies to be lesbians, because it would be easier to explain. Jake tells Alan that Kandi's mom, Mandi, has joined Charlie's endless list of sexual conquests. At Judith's front door, Judith won't let Alan talk to Kandi, she just repeats Judith's phrases, clearly without understanding their meaning. Alan then sees Kandi's dad, Andy, arrive for a blind date with Judith. Frolicking finale at Judith's, in rooms, bed and hot-tub.

8.3 /10

S3.E21 ∙ And the Plot Moistens

Sun, Apr 30, 2006

Alan turns to Jake's teacher for stimulating conversation, since Kandi obviously can't provide any. But the teacher starts to get the wrong idea about Alan's intentions.

7.7 /10

S3.E22 ∙ Just Once with Aunt Sophie

Sun, May 07, 2006

Jake attends his first boy-girl party, dating a smart girl, Wendy Cho. Alan was looking forward to coaching his son, but even Jake, who spends his schooldays watching the clock tick, isn't dumb enough to consider dating advice from him. Charlie proves he can coach a virtually hopeless case like Jake with appearance, dance and anything else. In fact Alan envies Jake so much, he still hopes for .

7.9 /10